LIKE all great men, Sylvester Stallone had a dream. A dream to put together a cast of old school action heroes for a movie which will make grown men weep with nostalgia for a time when bulging biceps and a bazooka were all you needed to make an impact at the box office.
Several text messages later to some old mates and his vision was complete.
So, cue the drum roll for Sly, Swedish man mountain Dolph Lundgren, Jet Li, Mickey Rourke, and, er, Jason Statham.
With more stars crammed into the opening credits of the film than there are bright, burning balls of gas in the Milky Way, The Expendables was either going to be the greatest action movie ever made or a stinking turkey featuring a band of washed-up old pensioners.
But expectant fans can sigh with relief because Stallone’s self-penned labour of love is, thankfully, more the former than the latter.
The titular Expendables are a group of mercenaries, led by Barney (Stallone), who are hired to bring down evil dictator General Gaza.
But when things don’t quite go to plan and the beautiful girl who is helping the team is captured, Barney embarks on a suicide mission to save her.
Like a geriatric Rambo with helpers, the plot is as fresh and original as Rocky’s M&S tighty whities.
But with its over the top action sequences, baddies being killed in ever more ridiculous ways and oodles of humour, the film is a charming and good natured summer blockbuster.
With barely a whiff of CGI, it’s an attempt to recreate the look and feel of classic action movies from the 80s and 90s.
Corny one-liners and cliches abound, but its all part of the fun, with in-jokes and references to the stars’ ages, physiques and careers providing some genuine laughs.
Pumped up to almost improbable proportions, Sly is at his grunting, testosterone-fuelled best, while Statham, as his blade slinging partner Lee Christmas, finally proves himself as a credible Hollywood action star.
Jet Li also holds his own as Yin Yang and Rourke is on hand to dole out wise advice as tattooist Tool.
And cameos from Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis are pure genius.
The Expendables may not quite live up to the hype but if nothing more, it’s an enjoyable homage to a genre which Hollywood and the public seem to have fallen out of love with.
Could this be the beginning of the action movie’s long awaited revival? Here’s hoping.
The Expendables (15) is out on Thursday.
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