PREPARE to find out just how much (or little) talent there is in south east London as the grand final of the hilarious spoof talent contest take place at the Greenwich Comedy Festival.

Greenwich’s answer to Britain’s Got Talent has been delighting - and horrifying - audiences at a series of shows held over the past few months at The Bird's Nest pub in Deptford.

Greenwich’s Got No Talent is hosted by Simon Foul and his team of judges - Lady La La, Papa Lazarus, Naomi Shambles and The Shadow - have been turning their highly dubious expertise to a host of brave and bizarre contestants ahead of what is set to be an exceptional final show.

Some of the finalists facing the judges on September 9 include so-called singer Wenderlena, a colourful eccentric who performs through the 'medium of sounds’, The Soviet Space Bat who claims to be a poor man’s Jean Michel Jarre, Ondrej, a man who suffers from a very bad case of stage-fright and Pam Tore-Ayres - a gifted poet with tourettes.

The final promises to be an over the top and totally outrageous evening with performances ranging from the strange to the downright ridiculous.

Greenwich's Got No Talent. September 9. For more information on the Greenwich Comedy Festival, visit greenwichcomedyfestival.co.uk