A support group is helping women who have suffered domestic violence turn their lives around. Reporter SAMANTHA PAYNE spoke to one victim about how the help she is receiving has helped change her life for the better ...

TO GO through a traumatic experience with no-one around to help can often make people feel suicidal.

For some, taking a bottle of pills is the easiest way out of a hopeless situation.

This seemed like the only option for Maria (not her real name), a mum who endured years of abuse at the hands of her husband.

But since she started going to the Her Centre, formerly known as the Greenwich Women's Centre, in Woolwich, her life has turned around.

And she is now helping others get over the trauma of abuse at the domestic violence support group.

Her 24-year marriage came to an end in 1995 after years of taunting and physical abuse nearly pushed her over the edge.

Her husband started verbally abusing her virtually straight after their wedding in 1971.

The abuse began when he had been drinking.

Then, after about a year of marriage, her husband's behaviour became worse.

But the housewife told herself he would change so she stuck it out and had a family with him.

Maria said: "He was a compulsive gambler and became more controlling.

"I knew the marriage was over when he shut my foot in the door in a rage, convincing himself I was having an affair.

"He used to slap me around and send me flying across the room, and even kick me in the middle of the night, which has left permanent bruises on my legs.

She added: "I could never bring myself to leave him because of my pride.

"My father left me and I used to think having my husband was better than not having anyone there for my children."

The mother-of-four eventually divorced her husband.

However, she never got over the experience and suffered depression for years afterwards.

Now aged 46, she fears she may never be able to have a proper relationship with a man again.

But she feels attending the Her Centre has given her new life and is encouraging women who need support to get in touch with the team there.

Maria said: "It's the best thing I could have done.

"The Her Centre really helps you get over traumatic events in your life.

"Without it, I would not be here. I often thought about reaching for a bottle of pills to end the pain of it all.

She added: "Now I feel more positive and I can use my own experience to help others pull through and not be a victim of their past."

Services development worker Daljeet Lall is overjoyed with how the group has helped to rebuild Maria's life.

She said: "We have a sound reputation for professionalism and good practice.

"We provide a safe, women-only environment.

"We are committed to the empowerment of all women, working with them to brighten their lives and determine their own futures."

Other services at the Her Centre include support groups for women who survived childhood sexual abuse and bereaved mothers.

The centre also offers self-development workshops to help women explore their strengths and creativity.

The support groups and workshops are aimed at building women's confidence.

For more information about the Her Centre, which is based in Hare Street, Woolwich, call 020 8317 4141 (voice mail option one).

SUPPORT GROUP FACTS

  • The domestic violence support group is for women who have experienced, or are experiencing, domestic violence.
  • It helps women understand about domestic violence issues.
  • It offers a safe, welcoming and supportive environment.
  • It helps them begin or continue to heal from the effects of abuse.