d=4,6What will your Christmas be like? Will you be kissing Santa under the mistletoe or frantically mashing the turnip to get the hard bits out? Relax, just follow our countdown to Christmas and it will all fall into place effortlessly. Particularly if your take a sherry or two as you go along...

The week before Christmas

Fill any space in the freezer with bread rolls and a vegetarian alternative to turkey, just in case.

Check you have enough bedding for guests.

Send last-minute Christmas cards and wrap your presents. Start panicking if you haven't bought any yet...

One or two days before

Start thawing the turkey and avoid the biggest Christmas nightmare of all food poisoning.

Buy your vegetables and make sure you have enough pans to cook them all in.

Check your Delia Smith book for a cranberry recipe, or go buy a jar.

If you still haven't bought your gifts, start thinking of excuses.

Christmas Eve

Get peeling and leave the whole lot, prepared, in cold water overnight.

Stuff the turkey at the neck end and put it in the fridge. Work out how long the cooking will take see our guide.

Decide you'll never get that Christmas sweater finished now. Stick a tenner in an envelope instead.

Christmas Day

Put the turkey in. It will need basting every 45 minutes, unless you like shoe-leather on your plate.

Take a break to watch the kids playing with their cardboard boxes (they'll be sick of their new toys already).

40 minutes before

Cook the potatoes and parsnips.

Chill the wine.

Cook any stuffing left over.

Put cranberry sauce onto the dish and put starters on the plates.

20 minutes before

Heat the bread sauce. Pour yourself a glass of wine... or two.

Wake up Grandad.

10 minutes before

Put the turkey on a warmed serving plate and leave it to stand before you carve it.

Dish everything out.

Sigh with relief!

Frozen turkeys the rules

To defrost: Defrost it in a bag in a cool room. Remove the bag and giblets. Once it's thoroughly thawed, cover and store in the fridge, and cook as soon as possible. Do not re-freeze once thawed.

To roast: This is a rough guide, because different cookers vary:

Weight: 5lb (2.25kg). Thawing time: 15 hours. Cooking time: 1 and three-quarter hours to 2hrs.

Weight: 10lb (4.5kg). Thawing time: 20 hours. Cooking: 3 and a quarter to 3 and three-quarter hours.

Weight: 15lb (6.75lb). Thawing: 20 hours. Cooking: 4 and a half to 5 hrs.

Weight: 20lb (9kg). Thawing: 30 hrs. Cooking: 5 and a half to 6 and a half hrs.

Cooking a turkey. Weigh the bird after stuffing the breast to calculate the cooking time, to be ready 30 minutes before carving. Place in a roasting tin and cover with buttered foil. Place in a pre-heated oven at 190C/375F/Gas Mark 5 for the calculated cooking time. Baste every 45 minutes and remove the foil for the last 40 minutes to brown.