Now not a lot of people will know this.....

Let's say that you go to the Princess Royal University hospital (Farnborough still to me and you) and lets say that you're a blue badge holder.

You drive round trying to find a parking bay and - surprise, surprise - all the disabled bays are occupied. (and not just by other disabled drivers but by commercial vehicles, minibuses, ambulances et al).

So, obeying the laws of the road you park your vehicle on the single yellow line, set the display clock on your badge and go off for your appointment. And when you come back you have a ticket....

"For why?" you ask yourself.

Because the hospital doesn't follow the rules of the road regarding parking. It has a private bunch of sharks - sorry , parking enforcement company - who do not allow parking on yellow lines with a blue badge.

Now if you approach one of the sloping fore-headed brigade who administer the on-site parking, and point out that you are allowed to park for free with a blue badge, you will be informed that you may be allowed to outside the confines of the hospital (including, as it happens the car park of Sainsbury's which is shared with the hospital) but not in the hospital grounds.

When you ask where it says this the answer is - At the parking ticket machine. Then when you ask why, as a disabled driver you'd be going to the ticket machine as you have a blue badge the slope-foreheader previously mentioned, having trouble walking and thinking at the same time, loses all control, turns his back and walks away ( left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot is how it's done.) Oh and don't even bother writing to the sharks - sorry parking company - concerned as, even following their demands of you sending a reply paid envelope THEY WILL NEVER, EVER BOTHER TO REPLY LET ALONE REFUND YOUR FINE. And if you don't pay, they can get your information from the DVLC and happily tow your car away and, if they so desire, crush it !!!!!

And by the way, beware the slope-foreheaded ones as they stand and watch you park on the yellow lines; they wait until you've gone away and then they go to your vehicle and give you a ticket. At no point will they approach you whilst you're parking and inform you that you're breaking the shark's - sorry parking enforcement company's laws. How do I know this? Because I sat and watched one of these morons lean against a post while 3 different vehicles were being parked and, as soon as they'd all been vacated he fell upon them like a vulture on a dead wildebeest.

Don't waste your time writing to the hospital liaison either as they're about as much use as a chocolate fire guard.

While we're in the borough of Bromley I think we should consider the Nugent shopping park as well.

Here ALL vehicles are videoed on entrance utilising NPRS (Number plate recognition systems); your time of entry is logged and should you exceed 3 hours - wallop - through the post comes a parking fine......EVEN THOUGH THE CAR PARKING FACILITIES AT THIS SITE ARE ENTIRELY FREE ! ! ! And it's worse if you're a blue badger again.

If you park and display your blue badge whilst NOT in a designated disabled bay... then you too may receive a ticket.

WHAT? Yes, you read that right.

Parking is free - ok?

You don't have to pay - ok?

but......

If you DON'T park in a disabled bay but you DO display your blue badge then you CAN get a ticket.

Have you ever heard such twaddle?

But since I was approached last Saturday, while sitting in my car, parked with my badge on display I am only reporting that which a blue uniformed 'enforcement officer' informed me.

I could stay either where I was and remove my badge or move to a disabled bay leaving my badge up. If I stayed where I was and left my badge up I would be booked and get a penalty charge.

You couldn't make it up could you?