Just a few years ago, Jahdan Grant was staying out late and getting himself into trouble with the police. He had lost interest in school and hadn’t thought about what he wanted to do with his future.
He had been living in unhappy foster homes since the age of nine, which caused him to rebel against his foster carers.
“When you’re younger, you get rebellious. You just want to go out all the time - and that’s what happened to me. I was going out and doing dumb things,” he told News Shopper.
When he was 15, Jahdan moved in with Pearl Cotterell in Brockley, through the TACT fostering and adoption charity which is based in Hither Green. A maths whizz at school, he is now studying aerospace engineering at Bromley College and is thinking about universities.
“After I came to Pearl, what helped the most was that I moved away from all the dumb situations I was getting into. When I moved over here I kind of learnt from that,” the 18-year-old said.
He explained it took him a year to fully settle into Pearl's home before he started to feel comfortable.
Speaking about the trouble he got himself into, Jahdan explained: "It's constant - you never have time to reflect on it. It’s one situation to the next situation; madness to madness."
But living with his new foster mum gave him a chance to "take a breather" and reflect on his decisions.
Pearl has been fostering since 2006 and has now looked after 10 children and young people. She told News Shopper she had always considered fostering but struggled to find the time.
“When I was younger some of my school friends were down in the dumps and running away – usually, they would run to my house.
“I was only young but I was speaking to their parents and mediating between them.
“I was also living next door to a family where the father was really violent to the kids and I would hear it. It was horrible.”
After she was made redundant from her job as a data analyst, Pearl decided it was the perfect time to start fostering – and she has never looked back.
She thinks the key to being a good carer is to invest in the child to make them see their own value.
“If people go into fostering they need to be 100 per cent committed,” she explained.
“[Foster children] have had a lot of disappointment and they’re expecting disappointment from you too. So you’ve got to fight that.”
When Jahdan came to live with Pearl, she arranged a tutor for him so he didn’t fall behind at school worked hard in the subjects he enjoyed – maths and science.
“When he first came, all I did was talk,” she laughed.
“I would just talk and talk about everyday life, and then I would ask him: 'What about you? What do you like?' just to get him out of his shell.”
Pearl emphasised the importance of making the home a place of calm and relaxation for the child – but said foster parents still need to be strict at times.
“They have had so much disruption by the time they get you. They’re so disrupted in their thoughts and their actions anyway so it’s up to you to instil that calm at home.”
Having looked after Jahdan for the last three years, Pearl is arranging for him to stay with her with help from TACT. Although he is now 18, new legislation allows Jahdan and Pearl to continue living together with government support.
When he is ready to move on, Pearl wants to continue fostering which she says has been incredibly rewarding for her.
“I’ve fostered children who have had such terrible lives. They hate adults and they hate agencies and they hate authoritative figures.
“They have this belief that they haven’t achieved anything and they believe when other people say to them that they’ll never amount to anything.”
Having spent the last 13 years fostering, she has watched those children grow into successful adults by believing in themselves.
“I always say to them: 'It doesn’t matter what other people say. You don’t answer to them. You be the best person you can be.'”
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