What do you do when your mini moo cow is destined for a giant's starter plate, your girlfriend has been carted off by an evil henchman and your mum is cheesed off by the tax increases? You don a space suit and wangle yourself up a beanstalk, of course.

And Greenwich Theatre's annual pantomime shows how all this is done in style of Jack and the Beanstalk.

I’d had a 20 year hiatus from panto until two years ago when I interviewed the theatre’s director James Haddrell and the pantomime star Andrew Pollard.

They both explained the conventions and complexity of the panto and I discovered a newfound admiration for it.

So in 2012 I went along to the Greenwich Theatre pantomime and had a great time but this time, the explosive charm, charisma, technical wizardry of the production beans blew me away.

Dame Trott (Andrew Pollard), who has also written and directed the production for the last nine years, was a towering inferno of glamour and comic charm.

Her cheese outfit was a showstopper and my favourite line, told to a terrified audience member, was both topical and suggestive: “It’s Black Friday – I’m on offer!”

The singing skills of the cast members were impressive and there were points when I felt goose pimples on the back of my neck. Versions of Clean Bandit’s Rather Me and Happy were particularly enjoyable.

It is hard to single out stars as so all of the cast was excellent but one of my favourites was the giant’s henchman Nightshade (Alim Jayde). He conveyed the sinister oiliness of a Sherrif of Nottingham mixed with the ghetto ridiculousness of Ali Gi.

Jill (Sophie Ayes) and Jack (Tom Oakley) were both great singers and bought charisma to their roles, the audience was totally won over by them, myself included.  

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Jill was fun and feisty, desperate to square up to the giant, and Jack was doe-eyed with adoration for her.

Martin Johnson's Mayor Boris provided the perfect mixture of pomp, bafflement and Elvis-style wooing.

The supporting cast were also excellent, with special praise reserved for the chickens who each conveyed a totally different personality (sexy, silly, mad, I thought).

Daisy, the tiny cow with identity issues, drew gasps of adoration from the audience (she had lost her moo due to all the trauma she'd experienced).

However the most impressive puppet was the curry-mad giant, whose size and animation, were incredible.

The massive face loomed out over the audience complete with hairy warts, bulbous blinking eyes and fists booming on the floorboards.

As we were leaving the auditoriuam my mum said, “They really got everyone involved, didn’t they?”

And it struck me that is the sign of a good panto – as well as enjoying the spectacle we were all made to feel part of it whether it was through singing along, laughing or groaning.

It hardly needs to be said I’m already looking forward to the 10th anniversary production next year.

Jack and the Beanstalk runs until January 11, 2015.

Call 020 8858 7755 (1pm-6pm, Monday to Saturday) or visit greenwichtheatre.org.uk