Pub review: The Beehive, Footscray Road, New Eltham

A pool-playing pubgoer in The Beehive asked his friend whether he wanted a beer and before I had the chance to say the boozer did not have any he had ordered a Fosters top.

I’m painfully aware some people say beer when they mean lager but to say it in a pub where there are no beers on tap, just lagers, is just mean.

There were two pumps where beers/ ales and so on could be sold but no beer badges on them.

The dartboard had also disappeared since my last visit to the boozer but a lively pool tournament was going on between friends, which was pleasing to see.

My uncle first taught me the game when he took me to the boozer for lemonades years ago and I think, if I had asked, the youths playing would have let me join them to recreate my childhood.

With my eye half on their game and half on the horse racing, being shown on a big projection screen, I sipped Fosters (£2.20) and Kronenbourg 1664 (£3.05).

They were the best of an average bunch and tasted exactly like mass produced lager does. I’m a little unsure why the Kronenbourg was a full 85 pence more than the Fosters — but maybe this disparity is just because the Australian “nectar” is cheap in comparison with most pints these days.

Thankfully what the pub lacked in beers it made up for with the friendliest (I’d also say prettiest but my editor might shoot me!) barmaid I have been served by for months.

Even with my face looking like thunder she chatted and actually did the almost impossible by making me smile. Apparently she has been off alcohol for five days and I’d like to think she would start to drink again if there were real ales to imbibe.